I can never tell which is worse. To be loved fully and completely and to be utterly terrified of losing that love, or never ever experiencing it in the first place. I struggle with this; if you text me, then I will text you and then wait for your text. And if you text me back I do not want you to wait for my text, but if you do not text me in response, then I will wait for your text. If you do text me again, because you are nice, then I will contemplate not texting you, so that I do not suffer from waiting. But I do not want you to suffer either, so I end up texting and waiting and suffering from waiting for your text.